14 Jan 2008

Eulogies for the rich, infamous and dunce I

I noticed a trend in the newspapers - whenever someone dies, people say so many great things about the deceased, it makes you wonder why they weren't as appreciated while alive as opposed to after they're dead.

Of course, they lie out of both sides of their faces to say nice things.

That got me to thinking though... what if a rich, infamous and/or dunce person died... what would his/her eulogy be like if someone told the truth as we saw it revealed?

With this in mind I thought I'd write a few eulogies and see what can I truthfully say about some of the monkeys we have acting out their antics in Trinbago.

So, moving on - let's see what we can say on Colm Imbert:

Today we meet to mourn the passing of Colm Imbert, father, son, husband, brother.

The highlight of his life was his appointment as Minister in the PNM government.

Despite being the holder of several degrees, and coming from a family of scholars, Colm was seen as being a jackass of the first order. Perhaps this irreverent perception was because of his more than frequent asinine remarks as a minister, which put him in the public view more than most and probably made him an unfair target.

Liking the limelight, Colm took every opportunity to publicise himself in the 'Letters to the Editor' sections of the major newspapers; responding to any criticism as quick as a hound dog on a bitch in heat. His English teachers would have been proud.

Being just a bit taller than a cricket stump, Colm suffered from the Napoleon Complex, and was noted as a result to be of a 'fiery' nature. However, a lack of vertical height is usually proportionate to a lack of horizontal... and with due consideration to the man, he really did detract us from his lack of inches.

When among giants such as Rowley and Pa-trick, Colm had no no need to bow while showing off his oral skills... he held his own ground.

So while we mourn the passing of the man, we rejoice knowing that the impact he made did not go unnoticed.