25 Sept 2010

Ah thought….

Dis is about those ‘famous’ words “Ah thought..” Just to be clear this related to when people say somik like the following:

  1. I thought it we did that …[on such and such date].
  2. I would have thought …[such and such is the case].
  3. I thought it was …[much harder than that]

Well I tell you these words or similar tend to send me into orbit on occasions. Why? They are words of ‘assumption’ or ‘presumption’. They don’t mean much in the real world, when you want to decide some matter, take some issue forward, or show somebody a way forward.

I eh know bout other people nah. All I can say is, when I am parting with my money I eh want to be ‘thoughting’ nuthin'. I want to know that I getting what I want for my money. So when I go into a shop and ask the specification of some goods e.g. hi-fi equipment or computer component – I want to know I paying for what I need.

So when some idiot sales person goes, “I would have thought.. [it was such and such]” – I doz go “And if I purchase based on what you ‘thought’ and it turns out not to be what you thought, will your company pay all associated costs in me getting this product refunded”. Den dey doz start to look at me like eef I maaaad.. and say some chupidness like “We’ve never heard that before from any customer” – which is really to say how utterly stupid the vast majority of customers are!!!

The bottom line is that people are happy to give you a story with vague assurances to get your money out of your pocket. When you gorn and the goods are not to your requirements, you have to exert strenuous effort to put right matters. This is about stress!! So yuh see me – my strategy now is to avoid people who going ‘ah thought’ or any variation of that.

Ah tell yuh eh, eef my name was Jumbie and there was no law, I would behave like Judge Dredd.